Sunday, Feb 20, 2011 - Day 23
Here's how my mind was working:
1st Mind, "I don't need to do relaxation today. I am already relaxed. Look, I am reading a novel and not doing any work. What's more relaxing than reading a book for fun?"
2nd Mind, "You know you have to do your relaxation exercise. You committed to 40 days. Besides, it's not just that you have to, you want to."
1st Mind, "Yes, yes, I know. But seriously, I am so relaxed right now. I'm not thinking about anything."
2nd Mind, "You know that zoning out with a good book is not the same as relaxation. Relaxation is about focus. Learning one-pointed concentration. Softening the jaw. Remember? I bet your jaw isn't soft while you're reading."
1st Mind, "OK, you're right. I'll do my relaxation. I'll just do it in a little while. I'll read just a bit longer."
2nd Mind, "Fine. I'll check back in."
OK - that all sounds a bit crazy but it was like that in my head all dang day. I think it's funny. When I am busy, I don't want to take time to relax even though I know I should, and when I am having a lazy and relaxing day, I don't think I need to take time to relax. What is up with this tricky mind?
I finally compromised between my two voices. I did a short relaxation after I came home from my Ayurveda class and before I picked up my book again. I listened to to Deborah Adele's CD, The Art of Relaxation, track number 3, Systematic Relaxation. It's a short track - just under 15 minutes. I do kind of feel like I cheated on my practice by relaxing such a short time. But on the other hand, isn't my 1st Mind right? Taking a day off to do not much of anything is relaxing.